chatwithketch

Intimacy hurts, but you keep quiet because you think it is something women simply have to bear.

You should not have to endure it. Read!

Q: Hello Dr, I just got married and I always have pain in my bladder during sexual intercourse. What should I do? And what is the cause? Kindly help me please.

A: Pain during sexual intercourse is more common with women but can also happen in men. This condition is called dyspareunia in medicine.

Dyspareunia is a condition in which one experiences pain during or after sexual intercourse. In women, the cause may be due to:

• Vaginismus: a condition in which the vaginal muscles go into spasms when an attempt is made at penetration.

• Lack of adequate lubrication eg due to hasty foreplay etc

• Infections of the vagina (like candidiasis as mentioned in the question) or urinary tract can also cause pain during sexual intercourse.

• Injuries/wounds to the vagina

• Emotional issues like stress or emotional disconnect from partner.

• Fibroids around the vagina or cervix

In men, the cause of this problem could be due to:

• Infection of the urethra (the tube which conveys urine from the bladder out of the body and also conveys semen out during ejaculation)

• Infection of the prostate gland.

• Infections, some of which may be due to STI

• Emotional issues may also be involved eg feelings of guilt.

Treatment depends on cause.

If due to infections, they have to be treated. If it’s due to lack of lubrication, that has to be handled. Some lubricating gels may be suggested.

If no physical cause can be seen and the problem appears to be emotional, some counseling may be required. Understanding that when people get married, they are actually two ‘strangers’ trying to get to know each other, should form part of the incentive for slowing down and trying to find out what pleases each member of the union.

Get checked sooner if you also have bleeding after intercourse, unusual discharge or sores, fever, pain when urinating or persistent pelvic pain.

Today is World Sexual Health Day. Being able to speak about pain and receive appropriate care is part of sexual health.

“My period has been heavy since I was a teenager. I thought that was simply how my body worked.”

But bleeding heavily for years does not automatically make it normal or harmless.

If you regularly soak through pads, wake at night to change or plan your life around avoiding stains, your period may be taking more from you than blood.

Every month, you miss work because of your period.
Every month, someone tells you, “It’s normal. Just endure it.”

Period pain is common. But pain that regularly stops you from working, sleeping, eating, or carrying out your normal activities should not be dismissed simply because it arrives with your period.

So, when does period pain need more than another painkiller and reassurance?

“PUT THAT COLD WATER DOWN. YOU’RE ON YOUR PERIOD!”

Who warned you about this?

Many women grew up believing that cold water makes menstrual cramps worse or prevents menstrual blood from flowing properly.

But there is no convincing evidence that drinking cold water causes or worsens menstrual cramps.

What about warm water? Well, drink it if you find it comforting, but it has not been shown to treat cramps better than cold or room-temperature water.

But, applying heat is different. A warm compress or hot-water bottle placed on your lower abdomen can help relieve period pain.

Gentle movement and suitable pain medication may also help.

If period pain stops you from working, attending school or doing your usual activities, please do not dismiss it as something every woman must endure. Get checked, especially if the pain is becoming worse or comes with heavy or irregular bleeding.

Welcome to ’30 Days of Women’s Health with Dr Ketch’. This September, we will have honest conversations about the questions women ask about their bodies.

Were you warned against drinking cold water during your period? Do you still avoid it?

“We’ve reached six months. So tomorrow, what exactly do I feed this baby?”

Pap is probably the first suggestion you’ll hear. But must it be pap? Can you give a whole egg? And does starting food mean stopping breastfeeding?

For our final Breastfeeding Month post, let’s answer the question that comes next: ‘what actually goes in your baby’s bowl?’

“My baby is big and plump on breast milk alone. Surely that means she is getting everything she needs?”

Not necessarily, especially after six months.

A baby can look well fed and still be short of iron. From around six months, breast milk alone no longer meets all your baby’s nutritional needs.

That does not mean your milk has become bad or that you should stop breastfeeding. It means it is time to introduce food alongside it, including iron-rich foods.

If your baby refuses food, stopping breastfeeding is not automatically the answer.

“My child is three and still wants to breastfeed. I am tired and ready to stop. Does that make me a bad mother?”

No.

The recommendation says breastfeeding can continue for two years or beyond. It does not say that a mother must continue after she is ready to stop.

Your child may not welcome the decision, but you do not need to wait until your child chooses to stop. You can end breastfeeding gradually and with reassurance.

“Put pepper on your nipples. Once she tastes it, she will stop breastfeeding.”

Please don’t do this.

Pepper or an unknown bitter substance can irritate your child’s mouth, skin or eyes. It turns breastfeeding, a familiar source of food and comfort—into a frightening experience.

If you are ready to stop, you do not need to shock your child into it. Drop one breastfeed at a time and allow both your child and your breasts time to adjust.