Q: Please ma’am, I had unprotected sex, but he didn’t release; but I am just scared. What will I do to clear my fear??

A: Well, the first step towards never experiencing this kind of fear is to remember your ABCs. A is for abstinence. Honestly, this is your safest bet. If you’re not ready to deal with the responsibilities of having a baby, please leave well alone. You can’t have an STI, HIV/AIDS, or otherwise if you don’t have sex. In addition, you can’t get pregnant. Now, if abstinence is a problem, be faithful to one partner…who, hopefully, is being faithful to you too. If you can’t swear on this, revert to plan A. Finally, if all else fails, ensure that you use a condom to prevent STIs and pregnancy.

‘Not releasing’ implies that you used the withdrawal method of contraception. Withdrawal method involves pulling the male organ out of the vagina just before ejaculation. This method may protect against pregnancy if used well but does not protect against STIs. It has been argued in some quarters that the pre-ejaculate (a lubricating fluid) may contain some sperm cells and so even if your partner is able to withdraw before ejaculation, the harm would have been done. However, the sperm in the pre-ejaculate is not there at the time the fluid is produced, but is sperm from previous ejaculations that was probably left in the urethra. It is believed that urinating and cleaning the tip of the penis before sexual intercourse helps to clear the urethra of the sperm left from previous ejaculations.

So, is it possible that you could get pregnant with this method of contraception? The answer is yes. You should also worry about the potential for STIs. I suggest that you visit your doctor for confirmation of pregnancy – though most GPs would ask that you wait until you actually miss your period. Then, if you are not pregnant, I suggest that you visit a family planning clinic for help with choosing a means of contraception.

All the best!

Best,

Nkechi