Q1: Good morning Dr Ketch. Please help me. I have this friend who I have dated for about a year now and we love each other very much. He proposed to me and then I found out that he’s HIV positive. I don’t know what to do and I don’t want him to think that I am leaving him because of his health status. Please, is there any possibility of us getting married and having children that are HIV free and me not getting infected as well? Please, help me because I love him so much.

Q2: Is it Possible for an HIV+ person to meet someone who is of same status with him/ her? Is there any forum where such persons meet? Thanks a lot.

A: These are two different questions from two different people. We’ll start with the first.

There are many considerations that go into deciding who you will marry. Pity is not one of them! I hope that your decision to go ahead to marry this gentleman is born out of love (and other needful considerations for marriage) and not ‘what people will say’.

Now, if we are clear and love is the over-riding reason, then, yes, you can have children who are not HIV positive and yes, it is possible for you not to get infected. It takes some work and extreme care but it can be done.

There are procedures like sperm washing and invitro fertilization when both of you are ready for babies. In the meantime, protection using condoms is the way to go. If there is accidental exposure to the virus during sexual intercourse, please use Post Exposure Prophylaxis…these are drugs usually used to treat HIV. They are taken daily for 4 weeks to reduce risk of infection.

Another option is taking a tablet daily as Pre-Exposure Prophylaxis. These tablets are also drugs used for treating HIV. Please note that even if this is being done, the use of condom should not be abandoned.

For more on this, please click on the links https://chatwithdrketch.com/2014/08/26/daily-health-tips-is-it-risky-to-marry-my-hiv-positive-fiancee-when-im-hiv-negative/

Daily Health Tips: Can My HIV Positive Pregnant Friend Have A Baby Without Problems?

Daily Health Tips: How Can I Prevent My Unborn Baby From Becoming Infected With HIV?

Daily Health Tips: Can I Get HIV From Oral Sex?

Is there a forum where HIV positive people meet? Well, in every city there are co-ordinators of People Living With HIV/AIDS. They would usually organize events and activities where people are free to socialize and interact. Where exactly do you live? In Nigeria, this website may be helpful to know different coordinators, contacts and perhaps, meeting times http://www.nephwan.net
 

I hope this was helpful.

Have a great night, people 😀